At least until the cats start stalking worms instead of cheese. I wrote the following story a long time ago. It’s a chapter in my book, Brain Juice.
The Cat’s Dinner
“It said ‘Dead Mouses never objecks to be eaten.’ It said ‘There’s no use wasting good Mouses.’ It said ‘Wifful–‘ sumfinoruvver. It said ‘And oo may live to say ‘How much I wiss I had the Mouse that then I frew away!’ It said–”
-Bruno, in Lewis Carroll’s Sylvie and Bruno Concluded.
A sudden whirr from within the black metal case nearby woke him with a start. He tried to go back to sleep, but the air was beginning to get uncomfortably warm. Soon he was thirsty, and went in search of a drink. He crept to the edge of his small space, sniffing for the cat along the way. A lovely fresh air current wafted through the open kitchen door. A grassy scent, a sweet scent, a flowery scent, and… a lack of cat scent delighted him.
Approaching the edge where he became more and more visible, he played his dangerous little game: sniff sniff… no cat? step… sniff sniff…no cat? step… sniff sniff…
He lunged into the open, pumping his hind legs into the linoleum, gaining the speed he’d need to make cover. But there was a paw in his way. Long sharp claws pointed at his face. He made a quick U-turn and his feet scratched against the floor as he tried to go back to safety, but there was another paw in his way, and more sharp claws. He couldn’t help but squeak.
Overhead, the cat’s body had turned sideways from its path toward the wall and thudded against it, sending a few hairs into the swirling currents. The paw in front of him moved out of the way, so he started running. For some reason, the other paw was pushing him along, helping him back. It lifted him off the ground, and held him against a rush of air. The wall was in his path. Everything turned white.
The cat was patting him when he woke up. The gentle pats paralyzed him. The cat turned aside and began licking its fur, so he righted himself. He scampered toward some shadows, but was instantly pounced upon. A claw embedded itself in his right leg, anchoring him to the floor. Each small move he made to escape brought a wave of pain. The cat began licking its fur again. He felt the claw slowly wiggle out of his leg. The cat’s big head was bobbing up and down on the other side of its body. As soon as he was free, he slipped his injured leg away from the paw, and crept very slowly away.
The cat’s tail startled him as it swept overhead, tickling his ears. He glanced back to see the big head still bobbing up and down, quickening his pace. When he felt his tail get stepped on, his feet automatically went into high gear, sharpening the pain in his leg. He felt his tail slipping out. He tried to push into the floor for more traction. He finally broke free, but was rolled sideways by a swiping paw. Large cat jaws opened and fiercely dove toward his underside.
The gaping set of teeth swerved in their path and caught his tail instead. A strong yank pulled him off the ground. He stretched his front feet toward the linoleum, splaying his tiny claws to reach it, but it was too far away. The pull in his spine grew stronger and weaker as he swung back and forth. He realized too late that he’d been flung into the air. Unprepared for the landing, he came down on his injured leg. He started to run again, not knowing where he was headed, when a large paw slammed down next to him, sending him into a blind left turn.
He ran into another paw, and was squeezed together and lifted off the ground for another flight. He watched the doors to where he often heard water running. They turned upside down and vanished from his field of vision. He managed to stop the mid air roll by twirling his tail, and got his feet pointed toward the floor. Instead of landing on it, he collided with a paw and went flying through the doorway into the other room. He landed on carpet and rolled to a stop. Carpet was great for traction. He headed for a dark space under some polished wood. Just as his head cleared the edge of the wood, the cat caught up and pinned him against the side of the opening. He scratched at the dusty carpet in front of him. He pulled a lot of dust toward his nose, but he couldn’t get away.
He felt a crunch in his injured leg and looked back to see a feline nose against his body. Their eyes met. He gazed at the huge green circles, helpless as his good leg made small pawing motions in the air under the cat’s chin. The grip loosened a bit, easing the pain slightly, and he blinked. The cat’s eyes drooped almost shut as its jaws loosened even more. They got tighter and looser and tighter and looser, oscillating between painful and comfortable and he just gazed at the huge green eyes.
The cat lifted him and tossed him back through the doorway. Pain in the leg and fatigue froze him. The cat started advancing, but stopped to lick its paw. He rested. The cat walked by him and sat down facing away from him. Its tail gently waved back and forth, touching him at the end of each return phase. He saw how close he was to his original hiding place but he was too tired to run for it. After resting a while longer, watching the bobbing head and being stroked by the incessantly swaying tail, he started a slow tour toward safety. He pushed off, the sudden pain in his leg only strengthening his effort, into a final lunge to safety.
The lightning quick cat had its paw on him before he made it. The jaws were around his lame leg again. He was dragged away from the safe place and shaken. He squirmed from the pain shooting up the leg and into his spine. When he squirmed, he was shaken more. When the cat finally let go, he was flying toward the wall again. When he landed he felt the warmth coming from behind the big white box. On his three functioning legs, he quickly crawled in and went to the smallest space he could find. It was very hot. Outside he heard the cat thud against the wall. Immediately, he saw one of its forelimbs enter after him. The extended claws made ticking sounds against the floor. He heard them scratch against the metal case. After a few more jabs, the forelimb vanished.
He could just make out the pink of the cat’s nose as it sniffed. A few of the whiskers above its eyes were highlighted from behind. The head turned sideways and he saw a large green cat eye staring at him. He backed further into his crevice. The cat face was gone and the forelimb was back, reaching right toward him this time. It seemed to get a little closer with each thrust. Then it was gone again.
When the image of the cat wore off, he began feeling the pain in his bad leg. He sniffed it, trying to get past the cat scent and tell if he was bleeding. There were holes right where it hurt the most. As he cleaned them, he remembered how thirsty he was. He felt the heat in his dark little space. He licked and waited. He sniffed and licked. He waited and sniffed.
He woke to a throbbing in his leg. He was very thirsty and uncomfortably hot. He sniffed for a cat, but the heat obscured his sense. He limped up to the edge, trying to smell past the heat. The kitchen door was now closed. Nearing the edge, he smelled some dry cat food and milk (ahh Milk!). There was a trace of human scent, mixed, as always, with deodorant, rubber, and soap. The cat scent was old. He had learned to distinguish between fresh cat scent and old cat scent on his first venture to the milk dish. He crept out slowly, sniffing easier as he left the heat.
Looking around the corner, he spotted the dish of milk, but no cat. There was a safe place on the other side of the milk dish. He waited for any signs of danger. He limped along the front grate of the huge white box, concentrating on speed. He glanced twice at the doorway to the other room, looking for the cat. He slipped between two cardboard boxes with the smooth glass inside. From there, he could watch the other room for signs of the cat.
He saw some movement out in the other room. It was a human figure with the cat, which usually meant it was safe. He stepped out to the milk dish. He stuck his nose and paws into the cool liquid. He went to the other dish and took a piece of food in his mouth. He quickly squeezed back in between the two boxes and licked the milk off himself. He savored the sweet drink that his body had warmed to the perfect temperature. He could eat the food later.
On his third trip back from the milk dish, the cat came out of nowhere. It got hold of his tail. He gripped the side of an opening in one of the boxes. Then there was a human voice. The human picked up the cat, which let his tail go. He scampered back, and watched, feeling the dull thud of his heartbeat in his leg again. He felt one of the boxes shake. The human voice came again, but louder and higher at the end. The box that shook suddenly rose into the air, exposing him completely, forgotten milk dripping from a whisker.
The cat looked down at him from the human’s arms. The human looked too, and made its voice again, very high pitched this time, but not too loud. It walked away with the cat and two bottles in its arms. He tried to jump onto the second box, but his bad leg was too weak. He tried to squeeze into it through a small opening. His front half was inside and he was flailing with all four feet, trying to find something to push or pull the rest of him inside when the cat came back. It pulled him out with its jaws around his rear and tossed him into the air. Then it picked him up by the neck and everything faded to black.
He woke to a strong scent of grass and he saw blue sky. There was a lot pain everywhere, but he was too tired to attend to it. He felt the cat lick him. Its tongue was nice sometimes, but sometimes it stung terribly. Sometimes the cat would bite him and he was mostly numb then. The last thing he felt was the warm rush of air coming from the cat’s nose sweeping over his belly.
Comments on Wisdom from Willie
Dave Scotese @ 12:08 pm
At least until the cats start stalking worms instead of cheese. I wrote the following story a long time ago. It’s a chapter in my book, Brain Juice.
The Cat’s Dinner
“It said ‘Dead Mouses never objecks to be eaten.’ It said ‘There’s no use wasting good Mouses.’ It said ‘Wifful–‘ sumfinoruvver. It said ‘And oo may live to say ‘How much I wiss I had the Mouse that then I frew away!’ It said–”
-Bruno, in Lewis Carroll’s Sylvie and Bruno Concluded.
A sudden whirr from within the black metal case nearby woke him with a start. He tried to go back to sleep, but the air was beginning to get uncomfortably warm. Soon he was thirsty, and went in search of a drink. He crept to the edge of his small space, sniffing for the cat along the way. A lovely fresh air current wafted through the open kitchen door. A grassy scent, a sweet scent, a flowery scent, and… a lack of cat scent delighted him.
Approaching the edge where he became more and more visible, he played his dangerous little game: sniff sniff… no cat? step… sniff sniff…no cat? step… sniff sniff…
He lunged into the open, pumping his hind legs into the linoleum, gaining the speed he’d need to make cover. But there was a paw in his way. Long sharp claws pointed at his face. He made a quick U-turn and his feet scratched against the floor as he tried to go back to safety, but there was another paw in his way, and more sharp claws. He couldn’t help but squeak.
Overhead, the cat’s body had turned sideways from its path toward the wall and thudded against it, sending a few hairs into the swirling currents. The paw in front of him moved out of the way, so he started running. For some reason, the other paw was pushing him along, helping him back. It lifted him off the ground, and held him against a rush of air. The wall was in his path. Everything turned white.
The cat was patting him when he woke up. The gentle pats paralyzed him. The cat turned aside and began licking its fur, so he righted himself. He scampered toward some shadows, but was instantly pounced upon. A claw embedded itself in his right leg, anchoring him to the floor. Each small move he made to escape brought a wave of pain. The cat began licking its fur again. He felt the claw slowly wiggle out of his leg. The cat’s big head was bobbing up and down on the other side of its body. As soon as he was free, he slipped his injured leg away from the paw, and crept very slowly away.
The cat’s tail startled him as it swept overhead, tickling his ears. He glanced back to see the big head still bobbing up and down, quickening his pace. When he felt his tail get stepped on, his feet automatically went into high gear, sharpening the pain in his leg. He felt his tail slipping out. He tried to push into the floor for more traction. He finally broke free, but was rolled sideways by a swiping paw. Large cat jaws opened and fiercely dove toward his underside.
The gaping set of teeth swerved in their path and caught his tail instead. A strong yank pulled him off the ground. He stretched his front feet toward the linoleum, splaying his tiny claws to reach it, but it was too far away. The pull in his spine grew stronger and weaker as he swung back and forth. He realized too late that he’d been flung into the air. Unprepared for the landing, he came down on his injured leg. He started to run again, not knowing where he was headed, when a large paw slammed down next to him, sending him into a blind left turn.
He ran into another paw, and was squeezed together and lifted off the ground for another flight. He watched the doors to where he often heard water running. They turned upside down and vanished from his field of vision. He managed to stop the mid air roll by twirling his tail, and got his feet pointed toward the floor. Instead of landing on it, he collided with a paw and went flying through the doorway into the other room. He landed on carpet and rolled to a stop. Carpet was great for traction. He headed for a dark space under some polished wood. Just as his head cleared the edge of the wood, the cat caught up and pinned him against the side of the opening. He scratched at the dusty carpet in front of him. He pulled a lot of dust toward his nose, but he couldn’t get away.
He felt a crunch in his injured leg and looked back to see a feline nose against his body. Their eyes met. He gazed at the huge green circles, helpless as his good leg made small pawing motions in the air under the cat’s chin. The grip loosened a bit, easing the pain slightly, and he blinked. The cat’s eyes drooped almost shut as its jaws loosened even more. They got tighter and looser and tighter and looser, oscillating between painful and comfortable and he just gazed at the huge green eyes.
The cat lifted him and tossed him back through the doorway. Pain in the leg and fatigue froze him. The cat started advancing, but stopped to lick its paw. He rested. The cat walked by him and sat down facing away from him. Its tail gently waved back and forth, touching him at the end of each return phase. He saw how close he was to his original hiding place but he was too tired to run for it. After resting a while longer, watching the bobbing head and being stroked by the incessantly swaying tail, he started a slow tour toward safety. He pushed off, the sudden pain in his leg only strengthening his effort, into a final lunge to safety.
The lightning quick cat had its paw on him before he made it. The jaws were around his lame leg again. He was dragged away from the safe place and shaken. He squirmed from the pain shooting up the leg and into his spine. When he squirmed, he was shaken more. When the cat finally let go, he was flying toward the wall again. When he landed he felt the warmth coming from behind the big white box. On his three functioning legs, he quickly crawled in and went to the smallest space he could find. It was very hot. Outside he heard the cat thud against the wall. Immediately, he saw one of its forelimbs enter after him. The extended claws made ticking sounds against the floor. He heard them scratch against the metal case. After a few more jabs, the forelimb vanished.
He could just make out the pink of the cat’s nose as it sniffed. A few of the whiskers above its eyes were highlighted from behind. The head turned sideways and he saw a large green cat eye staring at him. He backed further into his crevice. The cat face was gone and the forelimb was back, reaching right toward him this time. It seemed to get a little closer with each thrust. Then it was gone again.
When the image of the cat wore off, he began feeling the pain in his bad leg. He sniffed it, trying to get past the cat scent and tell if he was bleeding. There were holes right where it hurt the most. As he cleaned them, he remembered how thirsty he was. He felt the heat in his dark little space. He licked and waited. He sniffed and licked. He waited and sniffed.
He woke to a throbbing in his leg. He was very thirsty and uncomfortably hot. He sniffed for a cat, but the heat obscured his sense. He limped up to the edge, trying to smell past the heat. The kitchen door was now closed. Nearing the edge, he smelled some dry cat food and milk (ahh Milk!). There was a trace of human scent, mixed, as always, with deodorant, rubber, and soap. The cat scent was old. He had learned to distinguish between fresh cat scent and old cat scent on his first venture to the milk dish. He crept out slowly, sniffing easier as he left the heat.
Looking around the corner, he spotted the dish of milk, but no cat. There was a safe place on the other side of the milk dish. He waited for any signs of danger. He limped along the front grate of the huge white box, concentrating on speed. He glanced twice at the doorway to the other room, looking for the cat. He slipped between two cardboard boxes with the smooth glass inside. From there, he could watch the other room for signs of the cat.
He saw some movement out in the other room. It was a human figure with the cat, which usually meant it was safe. He stepped out to the milk dish. He stuck his nose and paws into the cool liquid. He went to the other dish and took a piece of food in his mouth. He quickly squeezed back in between the two boxes and licked the milk off himself. He savored the sweet drink that his body had warmed to the perfect temperature. He could eat the food later.
On his third trip back from the milk dish, the cat came out of nowhere. It got hold of his tail. He gripped the side of an opening in one of the boxes. Then there was a human voice. The human picked up the cat, which let his tail go. He scampered back, and watched, feeling the dull thud of his heartbeat in his leg again. He felt one of the boxes shake. The human voice came again, but louder and higher at the end. The box that shook suddenly rose into the air, exposing him completely, forgotten milk dripping from a whisker.
The cat looked down at him from the human’s arms. The human looked too, and made its voice again, very high pitched this time, but not too loud. It walked away with the cat and two bottles in its arms. He tried to jump onto the second box, but his bad leg was too weak. He tried to squeeze into it through a small opening. His front half was inside and he was flailing with all four feet, trying to find something to push or pull the rest of him inside when the cat came back. It pulled him out with its jaws around his rear and tossed him into the air. Then it picked him up by the neck and everything faded to black.
He woke to a strong scent of grass and he saw blue sky. There was a lot pain everywhere, but he was too tired to attend to it. He felt the cat lick him. Its tongue was nice sometimes, but sometimes it stung terribly. Sometimes the cat would bite him and he was mostly numb then. The last thing he felt was the warm rush of air coming from the cat’s nose sweeping over his belly.