Baby It’s Cold Outside

A mouse is 1940s jive slang for a pretty girl. In the movie “Pal Joey,” Frank Sinatra flips his lid for Kim Novak when he sees her in the chorus line (skimpy dress, of course) and says with a leer, “Who’s the mouse with the built?”

The wolf is a frequent symbol of the predatory male. In Tex Avery cartoons of the 1940s, the wolf is dressed in a zoot suit and when he sees a mouse his eyes pop out, his tongue unrolls like a carpet, and he issues a sound like a flivver’s horn — “OOOOOooogah! Ooooogah!”

Now in that historical context, I will give you my recently completed updated lyrics for this fine song.

THE MOUSE: I simply must go

THE WOLF: Baby it’s cold outside

THE MOUSE: The answer is no

THE WOLF: Oh, in that case, I’ll call you an Uber. Good night.

(Total running time: 16 seconds)